• R Hoyte

Navigating relationship difficulties

Updated: Jun 6


Many relationships encounter difficulties, relationships are about two people coming together and forming one unit that works together, supporting each other and building a future together. Some may disagree with the idea of becoming one unit and may put up an argument for holding to their individuality and not compromising this individuality for anyone, i.e., not changing who they are or how they do things.


Becoming one unit that works together is different to one person trying to change the other, in order for people/entities to coexist harmoniously they need to achieve homeostasis, this is important for psychological harmony and happiness as well as the practical harmony that will allow couples and families to coexist successfully. This therefore suggest that we cannot completely operate from an individual perspective as this seems to defeat the essence of being in a relationship. The challenge therefore is how do both individuals achieve the right balance, where they make the necessary changes to allow them to be vulnerable and honest with each other so they can co-construct the type of relationship that allows both of them to be happy. What sometimes happen is that one person tries to shape the relationship on their terms rather than co-construct the relationship together.


How do our understanding of relationships develop? Many people ideas of how relationships should work are based on their parents relationship and the relationships of friends and family. These relationships seem to provide a framework in their understanding and expectation of how they should be in relationships, what role they have and what role their partner should have, sometimes these ideas of roles and expectations collide causing a relationship rupture, this can result in battle lines being drawn and create ongoing difficulties in the relationship. When these situations occur relationships become adversary rather than nurturing and supportive. To avoid further difficulties sometimes help in needed from a professional, at R Hoyte Psychotherapy Services (www.rhoyte.co.uk) we are experienced psychotherapists with years of experience helping individuals, couples and families navigate there relationships successfully. We provide a safe space that allow couples and families to be open and honest with each other in a constructive way and allow supportive, helpful conversations to take place.


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