Eating Disorders and Identity

We live in a world where many people they present an image to others that they think others will find desirable, whether this be the images they post on social media that may be filtered to portray a body image of thinness that they have been indoctrinated to believe is desirable or when interacting with others, acting in a way that portrays them to be the life of the party, while masking huge underlying insecurities. For some people these insecurities may manifest in a variety of ways including body dysmorphia and eating disorders.

Eating disorders are becoming more prevalent and impacts both men and women, when someone close to us has an eating disorder, it can place lot of stress and anxiety on parents, partners and family members, usually by the time loved ones realise that there is a problem, the eating disorder has been impacting on the person’s life for some time. Loved ones usually endeavour to help and can view the solution as a simple one i.e., in the case of someone with anorexia they think it is as simple as telling them or making them eat. In the case of bulimia they think it is as simple as telling them/making them eat less. In their attempts to help they misunderstand the complexities of eating disorders, resulting in everyone getting frustrated and relationships becoming strained. As the person continues to struggles with their eating disorder, relationships with loved ones become more challenged and distant. This sometimes results in the person with the eating disorder engaging in hidden behaviours i.e., eating and then purging, to prevent further frustrations in their relationships with loved ones.

Loved ones can become focused on the eating patterns of the person with the eating disorder, resting in the person’s insecurities around their identity being neglected, potentially making recovery more difficult. No one is born with an eating disorder and all of us engage in unhelpful behaviours at various times in our life’s. These unhelpful behaviours are usually learnt behaviours and we believe that they help us navigate our challenged i.e., how many of us have a glass of wine (or a bottle of wine) after work, after having a stressful day. The more stressful days we have sometimes the more we drink. Eating disorders can be a manifestation of the insecurities people have or a way of managing difficult feelings.

When we have a positive identity of self we have a more holistic view of who we are and do not exclusive focus on body image as our identity but as a part of our overall identity. Positive identity of self means that we become less absorbed with perfection in our body image at the expense of subjugating other parts of our identity. Positive identity of self means that we have a more balanced way of paying attention to all aspects of our identity, this means

• having a healthy body image but not becoming obsessive about our body image

• developing our social skills

• developing our emotional management and emotional regulation skills

• personal growth and development

People with eating disorders usually present with difficulties in these areas and helping them to develop these areas of their identity can be very helpful in their recovery.

At “R Hoyte Psychotherapy Services” (www.rhoyte.co.uk) we have a holistic approach to recovery an have found that this approach helps people to address their insecurities and live happier lives

If you or someone know is having difficulties with body image issues or with their eating patterns, You should seek help from your local GP. Other services that you may find helpful, Beat Eating disorders” (www.beateatingdisorders.org.uk). R Hoyte Psychotherapy services can also be found on Beat eating disorders–helpfinder(https://helpfinder.beateatingdisorders.org.uk/r-hoyte-psychotherapy-services)

Anxiety and Depression

Anxiety and depression seem to have increased over the past two years. We have all had an extremely difficult time having to worry about our own health, our love ones, our relationships, our jobs, our finances, and other worries. These worries were intensified during the lockdown and has been causing difficulties in people's lives. At R Hoyte Psychotherapy Services (www.rhoyte.co.uk) we have seen an increase in young people and adults presenting with anxiety and depression.

With the highly publicised reports of racism, misogyny, homophobia and the persecution of some religious groups in our society, not just by members of the public but by some members of the police force (recent reports on comments made by some police officers on whatsapp), we have begun to fear the very people who at there to protect us. How do we live with these increasing fears and anxieties and how do we navigate them in a way that allows us to hold on to our happiness and not let our anxieties overwhelm us?

We live in a society that tells us "to keep calm and carry on", but what meaning do we make of this. Does this mean we should suppress our feelings and pretend that we are ok. this statement will have different meanings to different people and depending on how we make sense of the messages we receive, it will either help or hinder us in our daily lives.

There comes a time when we need to seek help to manage our fears and anxieties. There comes a time when we need help from a professional. Seeking help from a Psychotherapist can help us,

• to make sense of our lives and the world we live in

• to learn to navigate our various challenges in life

• to improve our relationships and have more meaningful relationships

• to reduce our fear and manage our anxieties

• to improve our low mood and depression

• to reconnect to our happiness

Visit R Hoyte Psychotherapy Service (www.rhoyte.co.uk) to learn more about psychotherapy and see how it can help you live a happier life.

Post pandemic anxiety and depression

Roger Hoyte

I am a Psychotherapist with a passion for helping people overcome their difficulties and live happier lives. I have over ten years of experience as a psychotherapist and I am registered with UKCP (UK Council for Psychotherapy) and AFT (Association for FamilyTherapy).

Qualifications:

MA in Systemic & Family Psychotherapy from the Tavistock and Portman NHS Trust, which is one of the leading institutions for Psychotherapy training.

MSc in Child, Adolescent & Family Mental Health from the Metropolitan University.

BSc in Psychology from Birkbeck University London (UCL)

Experience:

I have worked in various mental health settings (NHS and Private) providing individual psychotherapy, couple therapy and family therapy. My desire to help others has allowed me to approach therapy from a non-judgmental, caring and supportive position and to provide a therapeutic service that is individualized to the person’s needs. This is reflected in the way I work and my approach to therapy.

Specialism and interest include, Eating disorders, stress management, anxiety, depression, couples therapy, family therapy, relationship difficulties, parent/child relationships, developing positive self-identity.

I have supported people’s recovery for anorexia, binging eating disorders, bulimia and other eating disorders. I believe that recovery encompuses the physical and psychological and I have a holistic approach to recovery which includes exploring all aspects of the person’s life that may be having an adverse impact on them.

I have supported people in their recovery from anxiety and depression both within the child and adolescent population and within the adult population, helping people to develop coping strategies and patterns of behaviour that allows them to manage their anxiety and to improve their mood and live happy lives.

I believe that it is important for clients to feel comfortable during the therapeutic process and the importance of a good client/therapist relationship. At the heart of my clinical practice is someone who is caring and compassionate and understands the importance of creating a safe space to explore feelings and emotions. I am adept at helping clients explore and navigate relationships within their family and the wider society and also helping them to explore their relationships with food and eating and explore the unhelpful patterns that they may have developed. My therapeutic work is collaborative with clients to help them deconstruct the factors that impact them emotionally and to support them in developing the emotional resilience to manage complex situations and emotions.